TORRINGTON – “My whole life, I knew I’d be a mom,” Torrington’s Jennelle Werner, who has helped raise four biological children and at least 17 foster children, told the Telegram
this week.
“At least 14 (of the 17 foster children) have stayed with us for six months to five years – others have stayed with us a few days,” she explained.
Werner and her husband, Destry, became foster parents nearly a quarter-century ago.
“I actually started watching a baby that was in foster care and thought it would be fun,” Werner said. “We’ve done it for over 20 years. I was probably only 24 (when I started). One of our first foster kids was only 10 years younger than me.”
Werner said it was not unusual for her household to have six children at any given time, an undertaking that’s required support from her husband and, now-grown, four daughters: Alyssa, Brianna, Hannah and Jenna.
“Definitely it’s a partnership – Destry and I do it together,” she said. “If my husband wasn’t supportive of this, it would be different. Now my kids are adults and so supportive and loving. My oldest girls have talked about becoming foster parents, and they’re a ton of help now with our three little ones (foster children).”
An advocate for foster care, especially in Goshen County, Werner said the decision to become a foster parent entails both great rewards and challenges.
“I think it’s important because kids need a safe environment – that’s the bottom line. The kids need someplace safe to go, whether short-term or long-term,” she said. “We need foster parents so bad in our community. It’s hard to do it – it’s hard to give them back if you have to. It’s definitely the worst part, but maybe the best, too, because you know they’re being reunited with their families. Over the years, we try to build a relationship with the families, too.
“You have to make it work for the child, too. You can’t just assume they’re going to do everything you want. You make concessions and figure out what’s going to work best for each little person – sometimes they’re not used to structures or routines,” Werner continued. “They’re just so easy to love. It’s so rewarding, because it’s just really easy to love them, to see their little faces and know that they trust you.”
Despite the difficult moments, Werner said her experience as a foster parent is immensely gratifying.
“We have a baby right now. We’ve had her since she was three days old. It’s very rewarding,” she said. “We’ve had a couple of (foster children) graduate from high school while living at our house. That was also very rewarding, as it was a huge goal for both of those girls.
“We had a boy once who lived with us for 18 months when he was in the fifth or sixth grade,” Werner said. “He showed back up years later and told us we were the only real family he ever had. He brought his babies to see us. He visited our house in December (of 2016), and died in September in a plane crash. It was a very sad time for us.”
Both Werner and Destry came from large families, which has, perhaps, eased the transition to becoming longtime foster parents.
“There were 13 kids in my mom’s family, so I have 50 some first cousins,” Werner said. “We have grandkids and foster kids now, so I’m raising kids with my kids. That’s a great thing.”
In addition to raising children, Werner also works as Practice Manager at Banner Medical Clinic, co-owner of Destry’s Secret Garden flower shop and part-time employee for McNamee Auction Companies.
“I don’t get bored. We just kind of go all the time,” she said.
While the couple was able to escape to Deadwood last weekend for a night away, Werner said Mother’s Day is typically a very busy time for the couple.
“We own the flower shop, so we’re usually exhausted on Mother’s Day,” she explained. “We just want to see our kids, just go to the park. After the week at the flower shop, I just need a nap on Mother’s Day. My mom lives in Newcastle, so I try to see her, talk to my family. We go to church, go to dinner. Thursday, Friday and Saturday (leading up to Mother’s Day) are usually crazy busy.”
But Werner embraces the chaos, and encourages prospective foster parents do the same.
“Don’t get hung up on a routine,” she said. “Everything does not have to be perfect, and your life seems like chaos some times, but that’s just the way it is when you have a family. One of our little boys is going to play teeball this summer, and one of the little girls is going take dance – I’m so excited.
“I don’t know what we would do different – I think that the kids are worth every bit of the changes we’ve made,” Werner continued. “We went from having teenage kids, our house was empty for about three days, and then we said, ‘Hey, let’s get some more kids.’
We like it just the way that it is, busy, and we’re not lonely.
“I maybe would like to have a laundry lady,” she said, laughing.
Anyone with questions about becoming foster parents are encouraged to contact Werner.
